No matter how much someone turns you upside down,
What right do I have turning her’s the same?
The realization dawns on me,
That I’m merely seeking.
Love and whatever’s missing,
To complete me.
So I’m at a standstill,
Because so much remains.
Circumstances beyond my control,
Making my throat constrict.
Life—standing in the way,
Is it I,
Who’s simply gotten in the way of my own journey?
I’m drawn to her,
Yet I’m fully aware that the longer I persist,
The more I’ll suffer.
All the while,
She’ll never know.
Because I’ll never tell her I how feel right now.
That’s the answer.
I’ll turn around and walk away.
Life’s happening in front of us.
We forget and fall in love with that person,
Whose eyes speak to us,
In a language,
From a distant day.
The truth remains,
It’s long gone,
Whatever opportunity ever remained.
Time has decided our fate.
We are merely here to play the game.
I’m just lonely and looking,
In every wrong place.
I spill a vein,
In the way I know how.
Words that defy vocal remedy.
Words that save me from fooling myself.
Destroying my own integrity.
Struggling to accept,
She’s in the arms of another man.
Swallowing that acceptance is hard to face.
Spinning in a downward spiral,
So long as I refuse to reveal.
My own shadowy inception,
Over the way.
My path is what’s right before me.
Hers is not mine to stand in the way of today.
Why do I feel this pulling sensation,
In my heart space?
How do I sever this,
To breathe free again,
Whatever it is,
I’m missing right now about her,
Yet humbling acceptance,
Is the same thing missing in me.
Shaking my head,
Closing my eyes,
I ponder—what could have been.
Image credit: Ben White, Unsplash