Neither alcohol or marijuana are healthy outlets for parents, in my opinion.
Constructive outlets to channel or vent our frustrations is far healthier than masking them with substances.
Cancer, disease, ailments, etc. don't kill people. People just kill themselves slowly, over several decades on average—from substance abuse, stemming from one’s inability to process their emotions naturally and effectively.
As a wise man has said to me so often, "We're raising humans!" The option, is to show up.
We owe it to them to show up and be there, clear mind and body. It is they, who truly have something to offer us. We're just their guides and mentors until it's time to pass along the torch in hopes that we taught our children and grandchildren the value of sharing and reciprocation.
Lastly, we teach young people, peers and elders alike—with unconditional kindness. Our opinions are our own, and often best left to ourselves because all division is created out of ego.
Common beliefs are found through the cultivation of togetherness—thick and thin, as the old saying goes. This is nothing new. If you wish to understand this singular, universal language called love, then you must be willing to listen—with your heart, mind and spirit.
The mind appears to be the first place we process our emotions, which are natural. This process is normal but we must be aware of it, so that we might proceed with discernment, love and an openness to learn something beyond our own present, comprehension.
Children embody unconditional love. We instill their fears. Let them fall and get up on their own, unless it's an actual emergency that takes place. Stop expecting them to become a better version of you. They are who they are from childhood, onward.
We are abusing their universal free-will, lawful rights to explore with reckless abandon or caution. If they ask for our help, give it to them gladly—with fond appreciation in your heart and a thankless attitude.
The best we can ever do for them, resides solely in our character. People forget 'what' people were doing but we never forget one's character. It's our actions that speak such volumes. Our behaviors determine our outcomes. Attitude, commitment, attention and influence are the true motivators that either destroy its people, or unites them.